My players are terrible at tanking, so I made this landing page to help them with a little educational mockery.

Tanking– you know, the thing where the person with the full plate and the battleaxe stands in front of the person with the walking stick and the bathrobe. My players are not completely on board with this concept.

Where do I start? How about the wizard? She LOVES opening doors. And if you suggest that front line combat may not be her strongest position, she’ll be happy to tell you all about her AC and her mage armor. It’s 18, you see. She can’t be touched. Do the dice even go that high?

Then there’s the ranger. This ranger does not and will not lead the way ever. He’s focused on archery, which puts him in the back line, but he’s convinced he’s a glass cannon and, should any harm come to him at all, it is OVER. When someone opens the door, he won’t just be in the back, he’ll be another entire room away. Maybe two. That’s not me being funny, either– he is terrified of damage. And this is a character with a d10 hit die, 16 CON and the highest HP in the party.

The rogue will open doors, but only when the rest of the party is engaged in another fight and he thinks he might be able to sneak off to score some loot he doesn’t have to split. This is, of course, the D&D version of Russian Roulette: this room has nothing, this room has nothing, this room has some gold, this room has OH GOD GUYS HELP OH GOD PLEASE IT HAS SO MANY TEETH

Anyway, they thought this was pretty funny, so I thought I’d share it with you. If you’re wondering about the sword (or whatever you want to call it), it’s just a picture I found on the internet. It’s so over-the-top badass that I had to throw it in there.

By the way, Brazenthrone‘s Old Quarter is coming along nicely. The pencils are almost done and I should be getting some of the ink done tonight. Speaking of which, I’m gonna get to work on that! I do love drawing destroyed stuff.

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